Tell me about your parents.

My father was born in Penang and his parents were from China.

My mom was born in Washington, DC. She’s American. She was.

So, I guess the natural order would be to quickly explain how they got together and how they came to Singapore.

Yes. Please.

My maternal grandfather was in the US Army during Second World War. He was a tank designer and was involved in developing the Sherman tank.

After the war ended, he was charged with supporting the US Marshall Plan to rebuild western economies in Europe. He took the entire family along.

My grandparents, my mom and her elder sister, spent a long time in Europe.

Eventually, my mom settled in the UK to finish her university studies.

Where was that?

She was in University College London (UCL).

She was very interested in Asian culture and apparently joined some Asian society. That was where she met my dad.

What was your dad doing in London?

He was doing his master’s.

To cut a long story short, they went back to Penang to get married and moved to Singapore in 1955.

They were both teachers.

What’s the age difference between your mom and your dad?

My father was born in 1923. My mom, 1933. So exactly 10 years.

What did your mom teach?

She taught English and Chinese.

She told me a story that I will never forget.

She had walked into a class to teach the students English.

And then in the next period, she walked into the same class. This time, she was teaching Chinese.

All the students started laughing because they thought that she had walked into the wrong class.

When she started speaking Chinese, they were all astonished.

Her Chinese was better than mine.

How did she learn to speak Chinese?

She started learning Chinese when she was in London.

And then after that, obviously, to fit into my dad’s family, she continued to learn and speak Chinese. Because in those days, mixed marriages weren’t common.

She also spoke my father’s dialect, Sei Ngap (四邑), which I have never learnt.

Did your parents face objections when they wanted to get married?

They didn’t talk much about it. I suspected there must have been objections.

But my parents never showed any bitterness.

Did your dad have siblings?

He was the eldest and had three younger sisters.

During Second World War, he was an army interpreter for the US Army but he never talked much about it.

This was in China, but the war also led him to Burma (now Myanmar).

When the war was over, he went back to China to finish his studies. After that, he returned to Penang.

Do you remember where your parents taught at?

I think my mom taught in Gan Eng Seng. I remember my father was the first principal of Ahmad Ibrahim Secondary School.

Are they still around?

No. My dad passed on in December 1998. My mom passed in 2006.

Who were you closer to?

I would say my mom. I spent more time with her.

Although they both work?

Well, my parents believed that one parent should stay home to mind the kids.

When my mom had us, she stopped working.

When my father retired at 55, my mom went to work.

She was an amazing woman.

At 45, she learnt French and became a tour guide. Then she learnt Japanese and became a tour guide for Japanese visitors.

Tell me about your siblings.

I had an elder brother who unfortunately passed on during NS. Chun Kit died in a motorbike accident when he was 19. This was in 1979.

Did that affect you?

Oh, greatly.

I wasn’t very close to him because he was very busy. But he took care of me. He took me on trips with his friends. And he was my idol.

And you have a younger brother?

My younger brother, Chun Siu, is six years younger than me.

We both got married in the same year in 2000. And our kids are all roughly around the same age.

What does he do?

Chun Siu is a commercial pilot based in Japan.

So there are two pilots in your family. Tell me more about him.

He and I kind of had a similar track.

We both started our military careers in the army.

He also got a SAF scholarship to go to the UK to study psychology at UCL, my mom’s alma mater. He became a military psychologist.

Subsequently, he became a transport pilot in the air force.

I didn’t realise you can switch from the army to the air force.

Ya, he was in the army for 7 or 8 years before he switched. I think he was 28 when he did that.

OK, we’ll come back to your military career later. Where did you grow up?

After I was born, the whole family went to England.

I don’t quite remember why.

We stayed there for four years.

We took a boat back.

You came back to Singapore for primary school?

Yes, I went to Maris Stella High School.

Again, that was just following my elder brother.

I also spent 1.5 years of my secondary school there.

How come?

Since it was a Chinese school, we were encouraged to spend some hours in an English school to improve our English.

When few students took up the immersion programme, they introduced this programme called SELP, Supplementary English Language Programme.

It meant that now we had to stay in school until 3pm.

So I said, “Okay, if you want me to learn English, then I’m going to an English school.”

That was the beginning of secondary two.

You transferred to another school?

We were living in Mountbatten when we came back from England, and then we moved to Neptune Court.

The two schools that were closest to home were St. Patrick’s School and Tanjong Katong Secondary Technical School (TK Tech). (The school was renamed Tanjong Katong Secondary School in 1993.)

I no longer remember why I chose TK Tech.

I just went to talk to the principal in TK Tech and he said okay.

My parents were not involved in my decision.

I was determined. I knew what I wanted to do. I didn’t want to stay in school till 3pm.

Then you went to Temasek Junior College?

Temasek was the only JC in the eastern part of Singapore then.

It had a place in my heart because my older brother was in the pioneer batch there.

What did you study?

I started with double maths, physics and chemistry.

After the first year, my results were quite abysmal so I dropped chemistry to AO-level.

Was it because you were distracted by other things?

I was the president of the student council so I was very active.

But that was not the reason. I would say I lacked drive.

When you take further math, you need to do the tutorials every night. And I was struggling with that.

It was a matter of time management.

That was why I spent an extra year in Temasek.

You opted to repeat?

Let me explain.

In my second year in JC, I was still involved in orientation activities.

Of course, I kept reminding myself that I needed to settle down and study.

June holidays were around the corner which meant preliminary exams were near, and I still had not started studying.

So, out of the four-week holiday, I studied for only two weeks.

Then September holidays came and I was struggling. I was already burnt out. And I was nowhere near catching up. Then an event happened at home that totally threw me off and I felt I couldn’t continue.

I called my civics group tutor who was very nice.

She told me, “Go and see the principal.”

That would be Eugene Wijeysingha.

Yes and I knew him because I was the student council president.

He told me, “You can proceed with the A-levels, see the results, and then decide what to do next.”

“Or I can give you a place in the school so you can defer your NS, and then you start JC2 again at the beginning of next year.”

I thanked him and asked for some time to consider.

When the prelims came, I took the exam.

How did you do?

It was not great. So, it was very clear.

I went back to the principal to inform him that I would like to repeat JC2.

Did you have to speak to your parents about it?

I told them after the fact.

My mom said something that has stayed with me for the rest of my life.

She said, “What is one year compared to the rest of your life?”

And I was like, “YES!”

You mom was so wise.

I love my parents a lot. But my mom was especially wise.

We’re all kind of maverick in some way.

So you started studying immediately?

I took a long break and only started studying in the new year.

Some teachers told me that I need not have postponed, that I could have sat the exam that year.

I had to deal with what others were saying, including our neighbours.

But when I have decided on something, I would stick to it.

Before you know, the new year has started.

Yes. When I went back to school the following January, for the first time, I understood what was going on in lectures.

Like I said, I had lacked motivation in my first two years. I was sleeping late and when you’re not mentally engaged, you fall asleep.

What changed in the third year?

I don’t know what the break did for me, but it just felt like I was making a fresh start.

Having no other commitments helped too.

And because I was president of the student council, I knew all the new second-years would know who I was, so I was kind of shy.

It was very nice that two new classmates came up to me and said, “Hey, we heard you’re joining our class, welcome.”

And the teachers were also very supportive.

And you did very well.

I did well enough.

Two As and a B. And then, I think, A1, A2, B3 for my AO subjects.

Of course, by today’s scholarship standards, the results were not very good.

But I was happy with my results.

And then came NS?

I went into BMT (Basic Military Training) and I have to admit, I did not like BMT at all.

This was in Pulau Tekong right?

Yes, in Tekong.

Every time we booked out, I would be full of energy, and trying to make the most of life.

But every time we booked in, everyone would be very quiet.

I didn’t understand how some people could chit-chat and laugh while waiting for the ferry.

But I did well in BMT. I was a top recruit in the company. I assumed I was going to OCS (Officer Cadet School).

Were you sent to OCS?

No. Storeman course!

Everybody was like, “What happened? Company top recruit going to storeman course?”

What happened?

I suspected that my medical files were not updated.

The moment I got to the camp where my storeman course was conducted, I went to see the MO (Medical Officer).

He checked and confirmed my suspicion.

You really wanted to go to OCS? That was your dream?

I was looking forward to it. I knew it would be an achievement to become an officer.

Then what happened?

I was told they could not send me to OCS immediately and I had to complete the storeman course first and wait for the next intake.

But the course bored the hell out of me even though I topped the course.

Everything was done manually and I had to learn all the different slips and forms for different things.

Where were you posted to after the course was over?

I was posted to Tengah Air Base.

And I would see these pilots coming in with their sunglasses, in their flight suits and I was so envious.

It was my childhood dream to be a fighter pilot.

When did you start dreaming of becoming a pilot?

When I was four or five years old.

One of my mom’s cousins was married to an F-14 pilot.

On one of his deployments, they stopped in Singapore. And he took my family on board the aircraft carrier.

I believe it was the USS Kitty Hawk. I reconnected with Uncle Terry recently.

I assume being a pilot was your first choice.

Yes. But I also knew it was impossible because my eyesight was not perfect.

I had applied but was rejected.

I spent a lot of time at the air force recruitment centre looking at the brochures and talking to the recruitment officers.

Finally I accepted that I couldn’t become a pilot.

What were your alternatives?

If I wanted to be in the air force, the only choices for me were ADAO (Air Defence Artillery Officer) or AOCO (Air Operations and Communications Officer).

The AOCO job is closer to what a fighter pilot does. I didn’t just want to fly, I wanted to fly fighters. But I didn’t know better back then, and I applied for the ADAO job as I thought it was more ‘active’ being in the field instead of sitting behind a radar monitor.

I actually applied while I was still in the storeman course.

And you already had a place in OCS?

Yes, for the next intake. Tengah was just for six weeks.

But of course if you join the air force, then it’s a different OCS. I was going to sign on.

Were there more interviews?

The main interviewing officer told me that my results were not too bad but they had no plans to send me to university.

I just wanted to be in the air force so I didn’t care.

A few days later, they called to say my contract was ready for me to sign.

After I hung up, the phone rang again.

I picked up the phone and this woman said, “Mr Leong, don’t waste your time in the air force. Let me show you what the army can do for you.”

Who was the caller?

Captain Ng. She was a recruitment officer. I’m still trying to find her because she has played an absolutely instrumental role at two points in my life.

You had met her before?

Never.

Up to that point, the army was not in the picture.

I went to see her and she introduced me to different officers who had graduated from different military academies globally.

I also got to speak to officers from different arms.

In the end, she asked what my preference was and I said either armour or artillery.

I was told that they were prepared to offer me an overseas training scholarship in an academy of my choice, provided that I was accepted.

The entire process was really slick and impressive.

Did you discuss with your parents this time?

This time, I did discuss with my parents.

I applied to the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst in the UK, Imperial College and I opted for artillery.

We had an understanding that if I didn’t get the scholarships, they would let me go to the air force.

And you nailed the spot in Sandhurst?

Yes, after my junior term in local OCS, I went to Sandhurst.

And after that, three years in Imperial College to study mechanical engineering.

Did you do well in Sandhurst?

I received the Knowledge Prize. But of course, I was aiming to be the best international student.

I got my commission, I think it was in 1986, the year the movie ‘Top Gun’ was released.

I remember watching the movie and coming out crying because I had really wanted to be a fighter pilot. It just made my pain a bit more pronounced.

I totally understand how you must be feeling. That movie really made fighter pilots look so cool.

That same year, the air force revised the eyesight requirements and I read about it in The Straits Times Overseas Edition which was sent to us.

I remember calling my mom and asking, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I was kind of blaming her but I also understood that because they had already lost my elder brother, the thought of me becoming a pilot was not something they wanted to consider. Being an air force pilot is always deemed a dangerous job.

At the same time, they were also concerned that I would be letting the army down.

Then what happened?

After my first year at Imperial, I came back to do an industrial attachment and then a military attachment.

I visited Captain Ng, who was by then a Major, and she said, “Hey, I remember you wanted to be a pilot.”

I said that I was concerned that the army would be upset with me if I applied to the air force.

She laughed and reminded me that many of the officers she had introduced to me had moved between the different services in SAF.

She said that as long as I was serving the SAF, it was okay.

Before I knew it, she had called air force recruitment and made the necessary arrangements.

I went down immediately to the Aeromedical Centre in Paya Lebar and did all the tests.

I was so happy when the doctor said, “Congratulations! You meet the new eyesight requirements.”

Did you say yes to the air force immediately?

I needed some time to think because of what my parents had said. I was also concerned that I was already two years behind my peers because I had delayed my A-levels for a year and I had gone to Sandhurst.

In the end, I asked myself if I would be able to live with myself for not taking the opportunity to become a pilot when I was given one.

My answer was no, I would regret it.

Of course I was fully aware that becoming a pilot trainee does not guarantee anything. There are horror stories in the air force that you can train for two years and the night before you get your wings, you get the chop.

In the worst case scenario, I would be four years behind my peers.

So you said yes after much consideration.

Yes.

During the school break after my second year at Imperial, I came back to do all the aptitude, psychomotor and medical tests.

After I passed all the tests, I did the air grading which was a series of flights to assess my suitability. Pilot training is very expensive so they want to make sure you have all the attributes before you actually start training.

This would have been in 1988.

Did you actually fly in air grading?

I was flying. I just didn’t do landings.

The intent was to see how you react to instructions. It was really a practical audition.

After I graduated with first class honours, I came back to start my pilot training.

Tell me about your pilot training.

It started in Seletar and I flew the SF-260, then the S-211 in Paya Lebar. And then I got into the fighter lead-in course.

What is it like to be in a fighter jet in the air?

It’s difficult for me to describe but I will use words like ‘wow’.

The rush. The adrenaline. The fact that you’re managing a complex system.

There are so many things going on at the same time. And it’s not just the flying and knowing your aircraft. You have to work as a team because there are many people supporting you.

You’re fighting as a formation. So you need to coordinate. You need to be aware of who’s where.

Of course, improved technology gives you much better battle space awareness.

But the feeling of being in the air, doing manoeuvres, there’s no other job like it. There’s just no other job.

What was the first fighter jet you flew?

When I graduated and received my wings, I had an opportunity to train on the F-5 overseas.

It was a great experience. I still keep in touch with my coursemates.

From 1991 to 1993, I was flying F-5s.

And then the air force bought F-16s. But they were only sending senior pilots for the course.

I really wanted to go to the US to train and fly the F-16.

And then I tore the ligaments in my left knee.

While flying?

Playing volleyball.

I had to wait six months for surgery.

Obviously, I was grounded and I was itching to get back to flying.

To try to speed up my recovery, I tried acupuncture, I worked out in the gym to build muscle.

I read up about it. I opted not to go for surgery.

Fortunately, the air force cleared me to go back to flying.

At that time, I was already in a staff job.

Still no F-16?

Eventually yes.

I have to thank ‘Phantom’, the commander of the F-16 squadron at that time. Awesome guy.

He called me one day and asked, “Hey, you still want to do conversion to F-16?”

I was doing a full-time staff job and part-time conversion on the F-16 with Phantom.

Those were long days for me. But it was worth it.

How long was the conversion?

Mine wasn’t a standard course. It was part-time. I think it took about a year.

It was one-on-one and tailored for you?

Kind of.

Apart from ‘Phantom’, I also flew with other instructors.

So, you’re very blessed in your life?

I’m blessed. I keep meeting good people.

But I would say that there were people at the upper level who were not happy because they had different plans for me.

Did you go back to operational flying?

I finished my staff tour after two years and then I went to the squadron.

Subsequently in 1998, I was posted to the squadron in Arizona, US.

How long were you there?

I was there for a year and a half. I was there as the Director of Operations.

I was supposed to do it for at least two to three years. But I only did one year plus because I was sent to a senior officer course at the Air Command and Staff College in Montgomery, Alabama.

How was that course?

The course was great. I got to know a lot of international friends.

And then, you came back to Singapore?

Three key events happened during that period.

My father passed away. I didn’t make it back in time but I flew back as soon as I could.

The second thing was a good friend visited me in Arizona. She told me she wanted to introduce a friend to me.

Interesting. Was the friend there?

No she wasn’t.

My friend then asked me to join she and her friends on a ski trip in Lake Tahoe. I realised only 30 years later that the trip was the interview, the audition.

I wrote to this girl that my friend had introduced me to without knowing how she looked like.

You haven’t met her at that point?

Never met. There was internet then but the technology was still not advanced.

I included my ‘fiercest’ fighter pilot picture in the letter.

She wrote back but no picture.

So, I still had no idea what she looked like.

So the suspense continued.

Anyway, we communicated and one day, she told me she was coming to LA (Los Angeles) with a friend.

So I said, “Great! LA to Arizona is like a one-hour flight. Please come and visit.”

But before that could happen, I was sent to Alabama for the command and staff course.

That must be agonising for both of you.

Our course included a cultural trip to Washington, DC, and then we had a one-week break. That coincided with the period she was going to LA.

So I asked, “Are you willing to fly from LA to DC?” and she said, “Okay!”

I went to the airport having no idea how she looked like. I bought this little dinosaur from Planet Hollywood. That was my gift to her. We still have it today.

When she walked out of the gate, I told myself, “Not bad.”

Before we forget, you said three significant things happened during that period. What was the third?

I decided to do a reconstruction of my left knee because it felt kind of loose and ‘jammed’ at the same time.

What’s your wife’s name?

Evelyn. At that time, she was with foreign bank.

Tell me more about the courtship.

After our meeting in DC, we kept in touch and when my father passed away, Evelyn was there to support me.

So you proposed maybe about a year and a half later?

Let me finish the story.

So I did my surgery in Singapore and went back to Alabama.

Then the Asian financial crisis hit and the bank that Evelyn worked at was going through restructuring.

So, I said, “Why not come over and spend some time with me?”

Were you staying on the base?

I wasn’t staying on the base.

We were all renting apartments in Montgomery.

My school was half day, and the other half, I could study, research or play games. It was all up to us.

She came over and we spent some time together.

Towards the end of her stay, we went on a road trip to Florida. We went all the way down to the Keys and that was when I proposed to her.

Was she concerned that you were a fighter pilot?

I don’t think so.

I want to go back to your parents because they are obviously very dear to you. What is the one thing that you remember about your dad?

I cherish the time I spent with him when he started staying home and making the meals.

I remember his concerns. There was definitely trauma from the past. I won’t go into that.

Unfortunately, my father passed away and didn’t get to see my brother and I get married. He never got to see his grandchildren.

But your mom was there to witness all that?

Yes she was.

When my brother had his son, my mom said, “My duty to the ancestors is done.”

I was like, “Mom, why do you still think that way?”

She was American but she had embraced Asian culture.

And then she said, “I want to become a nun.”

How old was she?

She must have been in her early 70s.

My brother and I spoke and we decided we have no right to stop our mom from doing whatever she wanted.

She has given her life to us, so we should do our best to support her.

She became a Buddhist nun. She shaved her head.

But she was still mom to me.

Did she stay in a temple?

No, she still stayed with us. Sometimes she would stay with my brother, sometimes with me.

She also went on her trips.

When she said she wanted to write a book about her life, we were like, “Yeah!”

For how long was she a nun?

I can’t remember, it was quite a few years.

She went to India with her alms bowl, a toothbrush and a towel.

She was still so adventurous in her 70s?

She learnt a bit of Hindi to communicate.

Initially she was treated very well. But because of a certain class system, she wasn’t considered a full-fledged nun.

She was made to sleep on the street.

We didn’t know about this.

Until she came back to Singapore?

Her health started to deteriorate when she returned in 2006.

After about six months, she had a blood transfusion. The next thing we know, she was in a coma. All her organs were shutting down. She died soon after.

Does religion play any part in your life?

I think that people would start to contemplate more about religion as they get older.

At this moment, I would say I’m Buddhist by choice.

But I have not delved deep into religion.

In all your years of flying, have you ever feared for your life?

There would be moments when things were not going well or when I came dangerously close to another aircraft. But I never really feared for my life. If you do, you can’t fly.

Did the fear get worse when you got married and started a family?

No. It was the same.

I’ve never gotten to the point when I was worried for my life.

You must be thankful that you never went into real combat.

It’s an interesting question. I won’t shy away from it if I have to do it. But I will also think that it’s an ugly thing.

The good thing about the SAF is that we’re largely defensive.

The defence of our country.

We’re not doing anything morally questionable.

Does being a military man make you extra patriotic?

In a way. I’m patriotic to the country. Not to any party.

Sometimes in political discussions, you hear arguments like, “If you support the opposition, it means you don’t care about Singapore.”

There are other ways to govern.

When did you leave the air force?

When I came back from Montgomery, I still had to do the local portion of the command and staff.

Subsequently, I was assigned to be the Squadron Commander at the end of 1999.

The Squadron Commander job was very rewarding, but it was also extremely painful. And for personal reasons, I do not wish to go into detail.

It was probably around this period that I entertained the thought of leaving the air force.

I had asked to be posted to SAFTI but they sent me to air force procurement.

And one of my big projects was the A-4 Skyhawk replacement.

That was when I had the opportunity to fly the Rafale, the Typhoon, the Super Hornet, the Strike Eagle and the SU-30.

Procurement means you were testing what we were going to buy?

Not testing. We were evaluating. I spearheaded the evaluation exercise.

All the planes were wonderful to fly. They all had their distinct strengths and weaknesses.

How long did the posting last?

I was in that role from mid-2001.

I left the air force 22 years ago today. 1st September 2003.

What was your rank when you retired?

I left as a lieutenant-colonel.

Reasons for retiring?

I won’t talk about the reasons or incidents.

I would just say that there were push and pull factors.

One big reason was I had a young family and I wanted to support my wife and play a more active role in raising our two daughters.

I told myself that instead of suggesting to my wife what she could or should do, we should just do the parenting together.

When were they born?

One was born in 2001, the other in 2002.

Tell me about your daughters.

They are now 22 and 24 years old.

They both did business in SMU (Singapore Management University).

The older one is working on an organisation’s HR system.

The other one does marketing and strategy for Shopee.

What’s your parenting style like?

When they were younger, my wife focused on getting them through their studies.

I tried to focus more on life skills.

Are you close to your children?

Yeah, I would say so.

We have had our moments. Obviously, we have had phases of struggle.

So this decision to spend more time with the family has been rewarding for you?

Absolutely.

I saw them grow up, I was the chauffeur, I did the groceries, I did the laundry.

Of course, I did it together with my wife, and we also had a helper. I would say that I did my best.

What did you do after leaving the air force?

I notified the air force one year in advance that I was leaving. While I was serving notice, I was approached to join SilkAir as a pilot.

Did you really think that you could be happy as a commercial pilot?

I think that at that stage, I was happy to transit to something else as long as I could still fly.

And in terms of financial compensation, the salaries paid by the airlines are pretty close to the salaries in the air force.

But you didn’t join SilkAir in the end?

I did the airline transport pilot license exam while still in the air force. I was supposed to leave in September and join in October.

During that period, SilkAir was struggling because of 9/11 and SARS. Two weeks before I was to leave the air force, they called to say they couldn’t hire me immediately, that I had to wait another six months.

I still need to pay bills and put food on the table.

So I asked the air force if I could stay for six more months.

They said I could stay with a new posting, but I had to commit to stay two years or leave. So I left.

What were your other options?

In my other procurement projects, I worked with Singapore Technologies.

I had suggested that they engage an ex-pilot to work with their engineers on simulator issues.

So this was meant to be temporary while you waited for SilkAir to come back?

Ya, I thought I could be a freelance consultant for a few months.

Then I read a book called Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki.

I started to think maybe there’s an opportunity here because in the local market, there is a lot of engineering expertise but very little operational pilot expertise.

I thought about it long and hard because I had never thought of doing a business.

I thought that I would be an employee all the way. Going into business is like going into a totally unknown world.

But I said okay and I convinced my wife.

I figured if it didn’t work out, I could still go back to being a commercial pilot.

So when SilkAir came with a contract, I turned it down politely.

And that was how you got into consultancy full swing.

I’m still doing that now. As long as I’m useful and relevant, I will continue. I mean there are a lot of developments in terms of aircraft technology systems, unmanned aircraft and AI.

Do you miss flying?

I miss flying a fighter. Every National Day, when I look at the jets zooming over, I get excited.

Did you fly on National Day?

Only once.

Did your wife work after you got married?

After the kids were born, I asked her to consider staying home at least for a few years and she agreed.

But after four years, she told me, “Every time I go to gatherings, I’m only talking about diapers, milk powder.”

She felt that she was losing touch with reality.

So she went back to work?

Internet marketing was picking up and she could do that from home. She started writing blogs.

To cut a long story short, she ended up where she’s now — a life coach.

She’s also a trained counsellor. She’s also a therapist in emotional freedom techniques (EFT).

It is something that we are hoping to introduce to schools.

We’re aware of the mental wellness problem, and it’s not getting better.

And you are also a life coach?

At some point in my life, I felt that I was drifting. So I started taking personal development courses.

My consultancy is meaningful but I feel that I need something with purpose.

When I was in the air force, the purpose was very clear and ‘strong’ — to defend Singapore.

In consulting, my purpose is to help my friends in the air force get good equipment and services. But the purpose is not as ‘strong’.

In life coaching, we’re talking about transforming people’s lives. That is stronger.

When you use the word ‘drifting’, what do you mean?

I felt that I was just living without any clear purpose.

I want to ask about working with your wife in your life coaching practice.

I tend to focus on late teens and young adults.

She focuses on women and women entrepreneurs.

And then we have a shared portion where we deal with this very simple technique that we think will be very valuable called Emotional Freedom Techniques, EFT.

Evelyn is one of two trainers in Singapore under EFT International, an organisation based in the UK.

How does one become a life coach?

It’s an unregulated industry at the moment but the most recognised organisation is the International Coaching Federation (ICF), which is US-based.

I have achieved ACC (Associate Certified Coach) under the ICF.

What does a life coach do?

A life coach is like a football coach. The coach’s role is to help the team get to a better place or get them to a championship.

Life coaching is about helping you get to a higher goal, whether it’s in your studies or relationships, or anything in your life that you want to get better at.

In coaching, are you sharing your life experiences?

The essential part of coaching is not so much bringing your own experience.

As a coach, it is more important to get the other side to think and to ask questions to spark their thoughts on what they should do or could do.

What’s the most important skill of a life coach?

Active listening is one of the most important skills.

I guess being compassionate and non-judgemental are very important because coaching is not meant to direct others.

You want a client to find his own way.

Are people more willing to be coached? Do you see more people coming forward and say they need your help?

So there are many forms of life coaching.

There’s the very generic life coaching where we deal with more general issues.

And then, there’s performance coaching, executive coaching and career coaching.

My interest is in life coaching. It’s not where the most money is being made but it’s where there’s a lot more satisfaction.

What is the satisfaction? Seeing someone happy?

No, not necessarily.

It’s more when they see the light or when you see them transform.

Do you still fly?

In the early days, I had dreams. I wanted to buy my own plane for private flying.

After 14 years of not flying, I decided to get my private licence and just fly again.

I rented a small aircraft whenever I felt like flying until October last year, when I had a medical event.

What is your biggest fear now?

I wouldn’t call it fear. I still have goals I haven’t achieved yet.

What are the goals?

Obviously, I want to build a much better body. So I’m working hard on that.

I’m still vain.

But I think it’s a great journey to be on. Because it also goes into mindset stuff. Discipline, consistency, doing things that you don’t feel like doing.

So you exercise a lot?

I won’t call it a lot.

The exercise portion is twofold. I walk most days. We’re not talking about extreme sports stuff. The other portion is strength training with a physical trainer.

I want to be able to go on holiday where I can walk and not have all sorts of pain.

Are you hoping to live longer?

No. I am not specifically looking at that. They talk about length of life, lifespan and quality of life. I want the quality of life and my lifespan to be not too far apart.

I hope to be fairly strong to the day I die.

We’re at an age where we’re looking at how many years we have left – 15, 20 years. But we also know that life is uncertain.

I had a descending aorta dissection* in October when I was in the US.

What happened?

I don’t know.

It could be things that I’ve done or damage that has been done in the past. Definitely not because of all the workouts and exercise I’m doing. In fact, I think probably all that might have saved me.

I have to deal with the fact that I have to go for checkups every year. But right now I’m kind of thankful that I am kind of back to normal.

A question that has been on my mind. Why is your call sign ‘Dumex’?

Sorry.

The secret will be carried to the grave.

Let’s just say the cover story is I look like the kid in the Dumex advertisement many years ago.

And what kind of Singaporean are you?

I’m a maverick Singaporean.

When we first met, my wife found me to be very different from most people.

I tend not to follow the crowd. I tend to want to think for myself.

And that also showed up when I was in the air force. I was called a maverick and not in a good way.

But I am unapologetic about being a maverick. I draw on my strength as a maverick to lend critical thinking and out-of-the-box perspectives to the people I come in contact with.